Charmed Episode 7x04:

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Charrrmed!

Guide: On a search to find witches who have been disappearing, Paige (Rose McGowan) encounters Captain Black Jack Cutting (guest-star Harve Presnell), an infamous 18th century pirate who is searching for the Fountain of Youth to reverse a curse that causes him to age but never die. When the pirate transfers the curse to Paige, Phoebe (Alyssa Milano) and Piper (Holly Marie Combs) must break into a museum to steal the golden chalice, which makes the Fountain of Youth come to life. Meanwhile, Leslie (guest-star Nick Lachey) manipulates the outcome of a "Win a Date with Phoebe" contest so that he and Phoebe can go out; Leo (Brian Krause) continues to fight the voice of the creature that caused him to kill an Elder; and the sisters' secret is compromised when the mysterious Federal Agent Brody (guest-star Kerr Smith), comes to town to investigate them.

Quotes:

#141 -  [ 51 ]  +   x

(Paige orbs in.) <Paige> Do I look like a ma'am to you? <Piper> Morning, sunshine. <Paige> I was just at Magic School taking Wyatt to the nursery, he's fine I might add, and a student bumped into me and said, "Excuse me..." <Piper> A kid with manners? Alert the authorities. <Paige> You didn't let me finish. He said, "Excuse me, ma'am." Do I look like a ma'am?

#156 -  [ 49 ]  +   x

<Phoebe> Pirates? Like hot Johnny Depp Pirates?

#144 -  [ 20 ]  +   x

(Phoebe walks in.) <Phoebe> Yo-ho, hello! <Piper> Did you just call me a ho?

All quotes from Charmed for this Episode